From A to B

I've been on a bike more this year than any other, and I've thought a lot about our modes of transportation (thanks, SMG). Since my trip to China, I've stepped back into this side of the world, where everyone is dependent on cars to get around. I wish I could walk outside the door and see people, not vehicles. It's strange not to know your neighbors, and how much emphasis is placed on manners in the first stages of meeting someone. I don't think this is such an issue in Asia. People may have invaded some personal space and stated things I would consider rude during my travels abroad, but there was always unpredictable human interaction to observe. Sometimes it's just too quiet around here and I need to find that excitement myself.

Traffic in China is absolutely ridiculous. It's not gridlock, it's a collective consciousness of flowing harmony. Whereas everyone here stays in their lane, signals when changing lanes and then waves to excuse themselves, drivers in China can sense the presence of others, yielding instead of using aggression (like Tai Chi vs. Kickboxing). This resembles chaos, but it is rare to see accidents, which is hard to say about the Capital Beltway. People are not alert to their surroundings here, much like they are not aware of the dynamics of interdependence. Also, I never witnessed road rage in China.

When I explain the concept of pain to my patients, I often use traffic to illustrate the blockage of qi in our pathways. Maybe there was an accident (trauma), a construction zone (excess), or everyone is going under the speed limit (deficiency). All of these things will affect the flow of qi, the energy that helps to nourish our body, and stimulating certain points will help to unblock the stagnation while relieving pain.

After looking for videos on driving and biking in China, I started feeling a bit carsick. I remember having to close my eyes sitting in the back of a taxi in the beginning, or constantly ringing my bell on my bike to let people know I was approaching. Think about being a pedestrian in this. In most taxis in Hangzhou, a clear divider between driver and passenger is standard. This is to protect the driver so no one can strangle him from behind or attempt to assault him. I never really thought about how dangerous of a job it was for them until I took cabs every day for $1.50/ride. I also had to get used to being rejected a ride (in the pouring rain) if I wasn't going in the same direction as the driver. Eventually I gave up and walked home. If you have some time, watch this video and pay attention to the bike ponchos in the rain, people holding their umbrellas on bike, the pedestrians, the cargo on foot and bicycle, and how there is no such thing as "too close."

Keep it Simple

Each year I donate items to charities or organize a yard sale to simplify my home. Yet somehow, my surroundings don't seem to be less cluttered, and I have stacks of paper I can't bring myself to toss, especially if it's related to my education. If I know they are not necessary for survival, why am I holding onto them?

One of the hardest lessons for a person is learning to let go. Of objects, a loved one, your identity, ego, false notions, an argument, or any idea that is not improving your life. There are different motivations for holding on, and perhaps I can't get rid of the stacks of paper because they symbolize the years and money I spent learning valuable information. Or maybe it will be useful in the next decades so they should follow me wherever I go. But I'm just not ready.

We all have our own methods and pace for coping and dealing with stresses. I find it extremely courageous to admit that one's habit (i.e. smoking) comes from a pathway of self-destruction and a victimized life, to the extent that the possibility of health is beyond reach. In my opinion, this admission is a giant leap, a cry for help, and a moment of honesty. The fear exists that if we put things behind us, we may begin to lose ourselves. The focus remains less about loss and more about moving on, to make room for better chances in our lives, and to become our fullest potential. When patients come to me for addictions, I see in their eyes the readiness to change their lives in a positive way, the desperation in their voice to connect heart and mind, and to relieve the emotional and physical pain they endure. That is why I believe this medicine can work for anyone.

If you want to become whole,

let yourself be partial.

If you want to become straight,

let yourself be crooked.

If you want to become full,

let yourself be empty.

If you want to be reborn,

let yourself die.

If you want to be given everything,

give everything up.

-Tao Te Ching

The Art of Medicine

It wasn't until my third week of the program that I was able to see an acupuncture needle. Here in Hangzhou, the students have concentrations either in acupuncture or herbal medicine (although they learn both in their undergraduate education, a total of 7 years). The first two weeks I sat every morning on an uncomfortable wooden stool in various clinics, listening to the translator dictate herbal dosages and writing them in my notebook. The doctor sat across from her post-graduate assistant and talked with the patient for several minutes in a room full of people waiting to be seen and in the presence of extended family members. I was able to observe the interdependency of families in China and how the illness of one person affects many. At times during my cancer shift, it was the son or daughter of the patient that came in with X-rays, explaining the condition of their loved one in tears. When I visited the gynecology clinic, the doctor would recommend an ultrasound and the patient returned in the same hour with the results, since the hospitals were integrated. I am in awe of this concept.

When I finally got the chance to see acupuncture in China, I was a little intimidated by the quickness of the procedure. It was aggressive. It was effective. People had been coming frequently over the course of months. I have to admit it wasn't my style, but I learned to have courage. When Dr. Wang asked me to cup his patient, it was the first time I would really be participating hands on. With the fire in one hand and the bamboo cup in the other, I tried rapidly to create a vacuum to bring all the blood stasis to the surface. The darker the bruise, the better the treatment. The force was strong enough to draw blood. After receiving Chinese massage (Tuina), I knew these people could handle anything!

At another site, I watched catgut embedding therapy. The doctor injected very fine catgut proteins to be absorbed by the body into acupuncture points for weight loss, fatty liver and irregular menstruation. At the equivalent of $85, a patient could go home with them for 15 days and then come back for more. This therapy was in high demand and the acupuncturist was gifted with needles, also injecting doses of Angelica Sinensis into the necks of patients with cervical spondylosis.

These are only a few moments of what I absorbed during my time in Hangzhou. The variety at each clinic reiterated what I already knew-that TCM is an art to be appreciated and practiced safely without limitations. Every practitioner had their own style and their own relationship with their patients. My opportunities to make the medicine my own are endless.

Living Abroad

I am blogging from BLOG INN. It is situated on the eastern side of the city of Hangzhou, surrounded by fruit stands, steamed buns, tea eggs and doughnut omelettes. There are random noises of construction, chanting, children wailing and men whistling. I am regularly sleeping with earplugs and an eyemask, realizing that city life just aint for me. Living in a hotel and eating out every meal (or substituting meals for junk food/fruit on my shelf) isn't as exciting as I had imagined. At least the food is dirt cheap-$1 fresh Muslim noodle soup-score!



There are always inconveniences to traveling but seeing how drastic my life has changed in China during these few weeks is definitely surprising. I miss my family but I can skype with them on a regular basis, which makes it all so much easier. Having a cousin to visit in Shanghai automatically makes me feel close and comfortable too. I'm putting a lot of energy forth into making the most of each day and my time here. There are the awesome moments when I see a man towing 50 wicker chairs by bicycle as I dodge multiple people crossing my path, people carrying soup to-go in a bag, the whiff of herbs in the air, the sincerity of Hangzhou locals, and the 30m tall golden buddhas at Lingyin Temple.
Shopping has been a challenge. Clothes are made so cheap here, and it shows. Luckily I was able to go to the Silk District today to find a few special items. Most of my Mandarin conversations with the salespeople go something like this:

They say something about me liking what they have in store, would you like to try on?...

Me: I'm sorry, I don't understand. I'm American.
X: What? You don't understand? You look Chinese! (Americans are blonde!)
Me: I'm not Chinese. I'm from Washington. My mom and dad are Vietnamese.
X: Vietnam?! Your eyes are very big! Beautiful.
Me: Thank you :) How much does this cost?
X: (An amount that is absurdly cheap for the garment in American standards)
Me: Too expensive!

and if I really like it, the bargaining begins...


It may not be smart to admit I'm American since they will automatically jack up the price, but I can only pretend I'm deaf for so long. If I'm not into it, there is awkward staring, sizing me up, telling their coworkers...I walk away slowly, they follow closely behind, handing me the most distasteful attire and I question whether I look like I would wear that. I should probably dress up more to go shopping but my theory is if they think I can't afford it I'll get a better price! I find it hilarious that this happens at every shop I set foot inside. I don't bother explaining that I'm not from Washington state, because I'm sure they only know of CA, NY and DC, just like I only knew of Beijing, Shanghai and Hong Kong. I never had a clue that this city of 6 million people was the hometown of TCM and had so much history as the capital of Zhejiang province.

Are you Negative about being Positive?

Today was one of those days where things didn't work out perfectly for me. I thought I had a lot to complain about but then I was inspired by a Wall Street Journal article called "From Attitude to Gratitude...". It reminded me that I can wake up sometimes in disbelief that this is my life. It's nothing glamorous, or deserving of an ounce of envy, but I took a step outside of myself to realize that things are not so bad. I think it helps that I'm in a caring business where people are expected to be honest about the state of their health and environmental dynamics. Listening to others in grief or pain provides me with compassion, sympathy and gratitude, not to mention the reward of attempting to make things better.

In these rough times, my patients are stressing out. They are losing ways to cope and insomnia is on the rise. Whatever state they are in, they desperately want to have hope. Sometimes all we need is a reminder that things will be alright. My coping mechanism is to check my pulse and see if I'm still alive. If I am, then I'll say some sort of mantra or motto like "Each moment is a once in a lifetime opportunity." It's simple and free, even if it sounds cheesy. I don't watch romcoms for nothing!

If you don't feel like persuading yourself to be content, the exercise of writing three good things might be useful to you. When I'm feeling irritable, I think this helps.

1. The ice is melting, which means the odds of me falling on my butt are back to normal.

2. I'm going to do 90 minutes of power yoga tonight, which is guaranteed good feelings.

3. I'm leaving for China in a week! (I have something big to look forward to)

Care to share one thing that makes you smile?

The Company You Keep

                
Have you ever noticed how your life has similar patterns as your peers?  There are studies showing obese people have friends who struggle with the same weight issues (if you're a man!). In my social circle, a lot of people are getting married, and moving on to have children a couple years later.  eHarmony.com stated on a morning show that we look for mates with similar values, ideals, views and interests. One woman had been rejected three times from eHarmony and the only time she passed was after taking Percocet. When asking if it had to do with the "Do you find life meaningless at times" question, she received the explanation that it isn't how you respond to one question-she was a complex thinker, and the tests are not geared for those types of people. (In case you're wondering, she answered that she was a woman which made life meaningless about once a month...) Furthermore, the representative added that this is not to say that people who use dating websites are simple-minded. Perhaps complex minds are just less compatible with others?

I haven't been on these sites myself but do you imagine there are diverse options presented? They say opposites attract. Other people find that similar is better in the long-haul. There are times where I can admire a couple who is thought of as one unit because they are so alike. On the other hand, I think that dating someone with differences may be more rewarding because of the various challenges that arise as lessons in compromise and communication. Would you rather find someone to complement you, or someone who understands? I guess they are not mutually exclusive.

I think I have a wide variety of friends, in all colors, shapes, sizes, ages, educational background and classes. Those are seemingly very superficial things to me. Those who are closest to me can express what's on the inside in terms that I can relate with (like an open mind). I surround myself these days with a lot of family, and I think it identifies me as a person dedicated to long-term growth in my relationships. It's neat how a family can continue to grow and multiply. As for work, the only people I interact with daily are my patients, who on the surface are nothing like me and sometimes don't even speak the same language. But I love that I never know what to expect.  I like different people because I would rather learn from thousands of experiences than the only one I have been given for this journey. 

Live with a Purpose

Today I woke up, struggling to remember my dreams, wrestling with myself to get out of bed, afraid that my toes will begin to resemble popsicles in the 20 degree weather. I sat listening to my yoga station on Pandora, trying to find peace of mind but it was hiding today. Deep breaths. Mantras. I begin with yoga, and I start to feel warmer, so I switch to Qigong Sword Fingers. As my focus centers on my fingertips I begin to emit energy through my human handguns (like Clint Eastwood in 'Gran Torino', which I never would've guessed as #1 in the box office).

Following this, I received a rather profound experience at work. This probably happens to acupuncturists and healers all over the world frequently, but today was a first for me (in my own practice). The connection I had with my patient reminded me why I chose this field. I worked with her for two and a half hours, giving full body acupuncture, ear acupuncture, and moxibustion for her pain. Without needling locally, we saw immediate results. She was in disbelief and her eyes were watering as she thanked me incessantly. I, in turn, thanked the medicine and everything in the universe that made it possible for me to study this and have the wisdom to help others. I listened, she listened, and the result was balance instead of a tug of war.

It made me even more enthusiastic about the possibility of studying in Hangzhou, China in mid-March. If you are a practitioner of Chinese Medicine and would like to go for one month to study at the Zhejiang College of Traditional Chinese Medicine, please email me!!